In some respects, it seems like a scene from Groundhog Day. If you've seen the movie, you'll recall that Bill Murray lives the same day over and over again. In my case, I walk into the exam room and my patient is in there with my letter announcing my departure(usually crumpled up and thrown at me in disgust). I explain, as well as I can in the few moments we have, in a little more detail about the reason for my change. I don't mind talking about it, as I find it helpful to flesh out some points which were briefly touched on in my note. It has also been a bit of a relief, because now it's out in the open and I can speak more candidly with people about this important part of my life.
I have had an interesting array of responses from individuals.
One person congratulated me on my retirement, telling me she was so happy for me and that I had earned it, wishing me yet again happiness in my retirement and that she'd miss me. (I suspect she hadn't fully read the letter).
Two people have called me a quitter. I am not sure if this was their attempt at humor, or if that's how they see me.
One woman told me she cried for an hour after getting my letter in the mail.
A few people have gotten teary eyed (me too for that matter).
I have been the recipient of many hugs, from even the most stoic of my patients.
Someone sent me a very nice note thanking me for the "excellent car" I gave him. I suspect he meant "care", but maybe it was a car. I will have to check my driveway when I finish this post.
I have also gotten many nice cards and even a smattering of gift cards (Olive Garden here I come!).
This is not a hint for more of the same of any of the above. Truly, I wish it was as simple as retiring as that one person thinks. Equally, I would love to be in a position to buy you all cars, but not being Oprah, you and I both know that's not going to happen.
Rather, I just want to acknowledge, in all humility, how touched I have been by your kind words. Sometimes it is not easy to tell if my efforts on any given day, with any given person have any impact. It appears that to a few of you they do.
I will let you in on a little doctoring secret of mine. For a long time, I have often played a little mental game with myself as I go into a patient's room. I pretend that I am encountering an angel in disguise, the ultimate Secret Shopper, if you will. I imagine that I am being tested to see if I treat him (or her) with grace and warmth. I think of the reception Abraham gave the angels in Genesis 18. He thought they were just strangers, but welcomed them nonetheless. I imagine that I am coming face to face with a VIP, someone I can learn from as much as I can offer help to them. So far, I have found that most everyone has something to teach me, whether it be something very practical (e.g. get out of bed feet first to avoid headaches), or more sublime like how to have grace or patience in a particular setting.
In short, you have been my teachers and sources of inspiration as well. Thanks for all you do. I appreciate you. Now, about that retirement....
Friday, January 23, 2015
Sunday, January 4, 2015
New year, new beginnings
Dear friends,
Thanks for checking in to my blog. I have started this blog just so people can be aware of what I am up to. I know that many of you are patients (sadly soon to be former patients) of mine who have taken a genuine and sincere interest in what's going on in my life, especially as it pertains to my wife, Gabrielle's cancer journey. I also know that typically when a doctor leaves a practice, that's the last anyone every hears from him (or her). Time and again, I have had patients express their thoughts about "whatever happened to Dr. Smith or Jones". I think that is sad, as medicine is a profession built on relationships and it is unfortunate that when a doctor leaves, all of a sudden that's the end of a partnership that has been developing for 10, 20 or even 30 years or more in some cases. It is a special relationship, built upon mutual trust, respect and understanding, and I shall truly miss the interactions I have had with many of you. The decision to leave my current practice was very difficult because of these factors, but I believe it is the right one for the reasons I outlined in my departure letter.
When I first entered medical school, I always wanted to be a family doctor and it has brought me a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment. On most days, I can go home thinking that I did my part to help a few folks out, on the way to better health or wellness, and that's a good feeling.
As I mentioned, I will be working at the urgent care clinic of the University Washington in Shoreline. I have long been impressed with the University of Washington, having spent 8 years there as a student and also sending my son there for medical school (yep, watch out for the future Dr. Dudley (new, improved and 50 pounds lighter, version 2.0)). I will even be considered faculty at the UW, which means I'll continue to get to teach students, which is something I enjoy doing as well.
The most important thing about the new job, however, is that it allows me to have more flexibility in my schedule. I will actually work fewer days (albeit longer) and have the potential to have time off if the need arises. I have been working hard on enjoying time with my wife while she still has health enough to travel and do a few things, and hope to do more of the same in the future. I'd like to take a road trip to the parks of southern Utah (I hear Bryce is nice), possibly hop a Canadian train to Banff or even parts farther east like Montreal, or just amble on down the Oregon coast in no particular rush.
I am happy to stay in touch with you, as much as I am able. To that end, I thought I would include my e-mail address (see below), but I need to do so with a big caveat. The caveat is that I cannot offer any medical advice, answer questions about current doctors or where you should go to see a specialist. For that matter, since the e-mail is not considered secure (no fancy encryption), I am not even supposed to acknowledge how I know you, if you are a former patient. HIPPA raises its head once again. Also, I may not be able to answer every e-mail I get, so if you don't get a response from me, it's not because I am ignoring you. I will do what I can, but no promises. I just don't want to feel the burden of needing to answer e-mails for an hour each night (probably wouldn't be that long...I'm not that popular).
I will try and write something on this blog from time to time to update you on family matters (appreciate your prayers for Gabrielle, by the way), and how things are going at my new job.
I will end this post by reiterating what I said in my letter which is that I have loved being your doctor and shall miss you. Thank you for the kindness and trust you have placed in me. It has been an honor to be your doctor. Many of you have been great resources for silly jokes, best fishing holes, homemade treats, restaurant advice, tree trimming, bicycle repairs and all sorts of other things. In sort, you are my friends, and I am honored to count you as such.
Wishing you all the best for a new year.
Steve Dudley, M.D.
My e-mail: stevedudley@comcast.net
Oh, and in case you are curious and would like more information about my wife, we have a blog about her as well. It has been going on since her cancer diagnosis in January, 2013. It has a few more hits than this blog. At last count, her hits were 196,000 and I had 12 (not 12,000, but 12). That's life.
Her blog is: welovegabrielle.blogspot.com
Oh, one more thing. You may notice that the "blogger" is Daniel Dudley. That's because I piggy-backed on to his blog account, finding it easier to do so than to set up my own. Being significantly over 50, I find things like this a tad more challenging than he does at 24.
Thanks for checking in to my blog. I have started this blog just so people can be aware of what I am up to. I know that many of you are patients (sadly soon to be former patients) of mine who have taken a genuine and sincere interest in what's going on in my life, especially as it pertains to my wife, Gabrielle's cancer journey. I also know that typically when a doctor leaves a practice, that's the last anyone every hears from him (or her). Time and again, I have had patients express their thoughts about "whatever happened to Dr. Smith or Jones". I think that is sad, as medicine is a profession built on relationships and it is unfortunate that when a doctor leaves, all of a sudden that's the end of a partnership that has been developing for 10, 20 or even 30 years or more in some cases. It is a special relationship, built upon mutual trust, respect and understanding, and I shall truly miss the interactions I have had with many of you. The decision to leave my current practice was very difficult because of these factors, but I believe it is the right one for the reasons I outlined in my departure letter.
When I first entered medical school, I always wanted to be a family doctor and it has brought me a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment. On most days, I can go home thinking that I did my part to help a few folks out, on the way to better health or wellness, and that's a good feeling.
As I mentioned, I will be working at the urgent care clinic of the University Washington in Shoreline. I have long been impressed with the University of Washington, having spent 8 years there as a student and also sending my son there for medical school (yep, watch out for the future Dr. Dudley (new, improved and 50 pounds lighter, version 2.0)). I will even be considered faculty at the UW, which means I'll continue to get to teach students, which is something I enjoy doing as well.
The most important thing about the new job, however, is that it allows me to have more flexibility in my schedule. I will actually work fewer days (albeit longer) and have the potential to have time off if the need arises. I have been working hard on enjoying time with my wife while she still has health enough to travel and do a few things, and hope to do more of the same in the future. I'd like to take a road trip to the parks of southern Utah (I hear Bryce is nice), possibly hop a Canadian train to Banff or even parts farther east like Montreal, or just amble on down the Oregon coast in no particular rush.
I am happy to stay in touch with you, as much as I am able. To that end, I thought I would include my e-mail address (see below), but I need to do so with a big caveat. The caveat is that I cannot offer any medical advice, answer questions about current doctors or where you should go to see a specialist. For that matter, since the e-mail is not considered secure (no fancy encryption), I am not even supposed to acknowledge how I know you, if you are a former patient. HIPPA raises its head once again. Also, I may not be able to answer every e-mail I get, so if you don't get a response from me, it's not because I am ignoring you. I will do what I can, but no promises. I just don't want to feel the burden of needing to answer e-mails for an hour each night (probably wouldn't be that long...I'm not that popular).
I will try and write something on this blog from time to time to update you on family matters (appreciate your prayers for Gabrielle, by the way), and how things are going at my new job.
I will end this post by reiterating what I said in my letter which is that I have loved being your doctor and shall miss you. Thank you for the kindness and trust you have placed in me. It has been an honor to be your doctor. Many of you have been great resources for silly jokes, best fishing holes, homemade treats, restaurant advice, tree trimming, bicycle repairs and all sorts of other things. In sort, you are my friends, and I am honored to count you as such.
Wishing you all the best for a new year.
Steve Dudley, M.D.
My e-mail: stevedudley@comcast.net
Oh, and in case you are curious and would like more information about my wife, we have a blog about her as well. It has been going on since her cancer diagnosis in January, 2013. It has a few more hits than this blog. At last count, her hits were 196,000 and I had 12 (not 12,000, but 12). That's life.
Her blog is: welovegabrielle.blogspot.com
Oh, one more thing. You may notice that the "blogger" is Daniel Dudley. That's because I piggy-backed on to his blog account, finding it easier to do so than to set up my own. Being significantly over 50, I find things like this a tad more challenging than he does at 24.
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